Hello and welcome to my little nook in the internet! I am a beginner vlogger who goes by TsoHG (pronounced like So H G). If you are into nicknames Tso is cool. I have a link somewhere to my introduction vlog on YouTube where I explain the basics of who I am and my “purpose” as a vlogger.
In my blog here I am probably going to write longer and maybe more serious versions of what I put out on video. Or maybe more controversial. I don’t know yet. I hope to make this blog more of a cathartic release for my random contemplations that I bug my family and friends with on a day to day basis. Some of it may be depressing. Some deep. Most stupid but hey~ a little stupidity, interesting the world it makes…
In my introduction vlog I talk about the main reason I decided to start this in the first place. The longer and slightly drearier version mostly involves my health. I have Crohn’s Disease. I was diagnosed 10 years ago and was relatively stable in my early teens. Then once I hit my second decade everything went to crap. These last two years I have not been in remission at all and it has affected my life enormously. I am playing the “on again off again” game with University and constantly having to quit new jobs due to my inability to stand for more than 4 hours at a time. At the moment I am “off” Uni due to debt and constant hospital visits that seem to just put a Band-Aid on the problem.
Since I am at heart a nerd and actually thrive in educational settings this has been very taxing on me emotionally. I watch my friends and even my younger siblings gradually move towards graduation and the next steps in their lives while I remain in the perpetual limbo of declining health. I feel stuck.
After getting out of the hospital barely in time for Christmas and facing the possibility of my education being postponed again until August PLUS having to quit ANOTHER job… I cracked.
I boohoo’ed a bit and then went to the internet for solace, as one does. First came the funny cat videos, then the adorableness that is ferrets. But eventually I did realize I had a spark of an idea in me. I have a loooong bucket list, and in my more emo moments I feel like I am running out of time to start them. I figured that since I have a long period of “mental freetime” until August when I can start school again. I might as well use it.
One of the weird things that has been towards the top of that list for some time was to learn another language. Language is like a code, and the engineering side of me adores codes and puzzles. And if you unlock this code it is like a whole new world is open to the “code cracker.” So I decided to watch a few YouTube videos on how to start to learn a language. It eventually led me to this video: Hyperpolyglots. Let’s just say I had so many mixed feelings as I watched it. Random huh, since it is just a boring documentary video. But my initial feeling was akin to awe. These guys could do something that to me, seemed superhuman. It was inspirational.
But. The fact that they were mostly men irked me for some reason. Still does tbh. Like when engineering and math is still a “man’s” field. However nothing can be done about that other than prove them wrong. There were other things that struck me too, and they were much less… logical?…but I took them as a sign. Many of these hyper-polyglots were prone to autoimmune diseases. So here I am, half feeling like my world is going to forever be controlled by my health, and I see that there might be a ‘silver lining’ to this. I am going to take it no matter how improbable. I don’t know where they got that research, and it was probably a correlation which, as you know, can mean diddly-squat, but I am totally ready to embrace any placebo affect anyone will toss my way to keep my spirits up.
So I am going to learn another language. Well. In a year I will be able to have a conversation. In 10 years I hope to have 10 different conversations with 10 different people from 10 different countries. I want to be superhuman. And I think it is possible for anyone to do and I want to see if I can.
At this moment I have a new ember burning in my belly. I am starting my research into how to go about learning a language, because in school I didn’t really do any languages. I have found there is no “one way.” Dammit. But there are several core elements:
Repetition. Yeah okay, easy. There’s even a app for that.
Listening. Again internet is thy friend.
Writing and Reading. Still not a problem.
Speaking and feedback. Uhhhhh….
I can speak to myself no problem, but to TRULY have any sort of fluency you need to be able to respond to input. Which takes practice. So I have options on how to obtain that practice – find a class/tutor which to me seemed to be the most logical answer for me. Problem is I’m broke. Second option is again the Internet. There are soooo many sites dedicated to language learning and language exchange. It would be super easy to find a good one and learn there. I could find a pen pal or skype buddy. The problem with that option is I chickened out. Not really an excuse but…
I fear the internet. But strangely the idea of connecting semi-intimately with one person freaked me out way more than impersonally on a broader anonymous scale. Leave footprints without being truly seen so to speak. That is what gave me the idea for a blog and a vlog. I don’t really have to be seen for this – I have to be heard.
Of course this now gives me an outlet for all my other eccentric ideas. I can learn to play the guitar and vlog my progress. I can start reviewing all the books I read in this blog. I can start reaching out to others like me who struggle with their health. The possibilities are endless for this! So in conclusion, the main purpose for this vlog and blog is for my motivation. I would love to look back on my progress in the next year and see what I have done.
I am determined to make 2016 a year of progress and growth in any and every form.
I will write again next week in my first language blog. Also I will introduce the “Book of the Week”. Sadly, since I have only been studying my two languages for two weeks I probably will only be able to write a meager paragraph, but “the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” as they say. Or that one dude did. Confucius?